Daddy's Arms

I had a dream a few months ago. I wrote this within days so I wouldn’t forget a detail.  With today being my dad’s birthday, I thought it would be a good time to share.

It was winter and I was at my parents' home in Dixfield. I was late for work, it was snowing like crazy and my vehicle was buried and wouldn't start.  I felt panicked and didn't know what I was going to do. I went inside to tell my mom that I would have to call someone to either give me a jump or a ride, and then went into the garage to get a shovel.  I came out, worried and stressed, ready to start digging my car out. Mom was standing in the driveway and I said to her, "This is just great - nothing EVER goes my way."  She turned to me and said, "Look."

I saw that the driveway had been plowed. My car was completely cleared of snow, running and warming up.  I turned to ask her "What? How?", when suddenly, out of nowhere, my dad was standing there - wearing his typical flannel shirt and jeans.  I turned to him to say "thank you" and put my hand gently on his arm, afraid to touch him because he was so sick. But he wasn't sick. This was strong, healthy, pre-cancer dad -- and he took my hand, he pulled me in close and gave me the biggest, warmest, heartfelt hug.  I buried my face in his chest and inhaled deeply of that familiar dad scent that took me back to my childhood.  I don't think he actually said the words "It will be alright" - but I knew deep in my heart that it would be.

Before I could say or do more, I woke up. I was devastated and felt like my dad had been torn from my life all over again. As I cried, I tried desperately to go back to sleep and pick up the dream where I'd left off.  It was no use. I got out of bed. I was shaken and sad, but I was also elated that I'd had that brief moment in my father's arms once again. Because there, there was no fear, nothing was overwhelming, nothing was impossible. There, I was a little girl again and daddy was going to make everything OK. 

A few weeks before having this dream, I had said to Jimmy "I wish my dad was here.  I want to talk to him and get his advice."  Now, having some time to recover from the incredible realness of the dream, time to replay it and cherish it, I can say two things with absolute conviction: My dad IS here and is watching over me -- and no matter how old I get I will always yearn for that safe, secure, I-know-I'm-loved feeling that only my daddy could give me.  

Been a while!

It has been a looong time since I have posted a blog entry. I'm hoping to pick it back up again on a regular basis - but until I get into my old groove, I will start small and just fill you in on what we did this weekend.

We decided to visit the local fish hatchery on Saturday. It's not a very large facility, but in a nice, scenic area where you can fish and picnic. There were lots of families, with small children running around with their kid-size poles. Brought back memories of fishing with my parents when me and my sisters were little. Dad would make us poles from small branches, set us on a rock on the side of the brook, and hope for the best. We only fell in once in a while, and we actually caught quite a few fish! The last time I went brook fishing with my dad, just the two of us, I was 5 months pregnant with my son. Dad spent more time worrying about me hopping from rock to rock with my growing belly than he did fishing.

At the Walhalla Fish Hatchery, they raise trout (brown, brook and rainbow) for stocking ponds and lakes around upcountry South Carolina. When you walk beside the tanks, the fish think they are going to get fed, and start flipping out (pun intended). They jump right up out of the water. A few casualities lay on the pavement... One tank held only display trout - and some of them were HUGE.

Today, we drove into Georgia and wound up at Toccoa Falls, on the campus of Toccoa Falls College. The campus is very pretty, with a stream running alongside the road, and several historical markers scattered around.

The falls has a drop of 186 feet into a small pool that is surrounded by large rocks and boulders. It is the largest waterfall we have visited so far.

 There is a memorial on the site, dedicated to the 39 people (mostly college personnel) who died in 1977 when the dam above the falls broke and flooded the campus.

We stopped at the South Carolina welcome center on the way home to pick up a bunch of pamphlets and brochures - offering up lots of possibilities for future adventures. A visit to Charleston this fall is definitely on the "must-do" list.  There are many events and festivals coming up, too, so I am sure I will have lots to blog about in the coming months.